Honouring Our Fathers

Silas Bamigbola

Many of us saw our fathers as heroes while we were growing up. We honoured them and saw them as the ultimate goal because of their presence, provision, and sacrifices for us. As time goes on, we may realize some inconsistencies that make them less perfect than we thought. Do we still honour and respect them? Seeing our fathers’ imperfections and yet honouring them is a challenge many men face.

One of Noah’s sons, Ham, saw his father’s nakedness and went to tell his brothers. Instead of honouring him and covering it, he made jest of his father. In contrast, Shem and Japheth honoured their father and covered his nakedness. As a result, Ham was cursed. This story teaches a profound lesson about honour and respect (Genesis 9:20-27). It emphasizes the importance of protecting our fathers’ dignity, even when we see their flaws.

Sons who do not know how to honour their fathers will not find it easy to navigate life. Honour is a foundational principle that influences our character and relationships. Ephesians 6:2-3 states, “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—“so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” This commandment underscores the significance of honouring our parents as a cornerstone for a blessed life.

Many of our fathers, even those in the faith, might have some inconsistencies and weaknesses. We must not dishonour them or think we know more than they do. Respecting our fathers does not mean ignoring their faults but recognizing their humanity and the roles they have played in our lives. Proverbs 20:20 warns, “If someone curses their father or mother, their lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness.” This verse serves as a stark reminder of the consequences of disrespect.

How to Honour Our Fathers

1. Acknowledge Their Efforts: Appreciate the sacrifices and efforts they have made for your well-being. Express gratitude for the ways they have supported and provided for you.

2. Show Compassion and Understanding: Understand that your father is human and has his own struggles and weaknesses. Show empathy and patience when dealing with his shortcomings.

3. Communicate Respectfully: Speak to your father with respect and kindness, even when you disagree. Constructive communication helps maintain a healthy relationship.

4. Follow Their Guidance: Recognize the wisdom in their experiences and teachings. Even if you choose a different path, value the lessons they have imparted.

5. Support Them in Old Age: Just as they cared for you when you were young, be there for them in their later years. Offer emotional, financial, or physical support as needed.

Honouring our fathers is not about ignoring their flaws but about respecting them despite their imperfections. It is about valuing their role in our lives and upholding the principle of honour that enriches our character and relationships. By doing so, we fulfill a divine commandment and build a legacy of respect and reverence for future generations.

The Essential Roles of Fathers in Raising Responsible Men

EriOluwa Bamigbola

The assurance that comes with knowing one has a father is always encompassing. This can be observed most often in the way children, both males and females, feel secure in a place when they can see their father present. Moreover, the guarantee that a male child will be well-nurtured and developed into a mature adult is almost certain if the role of a father is prominent during his formative and youthful days.

From the aforementioned, it is evident that the role of a father is undeniably crucial and should not be underestimated. In this discussion, let’s consider five key roles a father plays in maturing a male child into a responsible man and eventually a good father:

1. Vision Casting

2. Diligence

3. Discipline

4. Love

5. Godliness

• Vision Casting: The extent to which one will succeed in life and the commitment to living a fulfilling life often depend on having a clear vision. A father plays a vital role in helping his offspring lead a purpose-driven life by setting an example through his own actions and choices.

• Diligence: A father’s commitment to his family becomes palpable over time, and his dedication is something that both his family and others can easily perceive. This dedication is demonstrated through the lengths he goes to for his family, the sacrifices he is willing to make, and his strong work ethic in ensuring his family thrives. The way a father provides for his family serves as a valuable lesson for his children, teaching them that a responsible man should not be idle in order to provide for his loved ones.

• Discipline: Discipline is a key factor in determining whether one will lead a fulfilled life or not. A father who lives a disciplined life can effectively guide his children to lead disciplined lives as well, as they can witness firsthand what it means to exercise self-control. Children will also learn the importance of avoiding social vices, resisting peer pressure, and making choices that will positively impact their lives.

• Love: A child who feels their father’s love at home does not need to seek validation from others to lead a life aligned with their values and beliefs. A father is expected to love his children, ensuring that they do not feel the need to seek love at any cost. Discipline should be administered with love, and communication should be rooted in love. When this approach is taken, children will feel comfortable opening up to their father when facing challenges and seeking guidance.

• Godliness: The foundation for living a purposeful life lies in being godly and having a reverence for God. A father is expected to set an example of godliness for his children, as it helps them live lives characterized by integrity and faithfulness. Children who uphold these values will not bring shame to their parents.

In conclusion, the role of a father in shaping godly men cannot be overstated. Fatherhood is a significant influence on a child’s development and eventual character.