Tag Archive | purpose

Honouring Our Fathers

Many of us saw our fathers as heroes while we were growing up. We honoured them and saw them as the ultimate goal because of their presence, provision, and sacrifices for us. As time goes on, we may realize some inconsistencies that make them less perfect than we thought. Do we still honour and respect them? Seeing our fathers’ imperfections and yet honouring them is a challenge many men face.

One of Noah’s sons, Ham, saw his father’s nakedness and went to tell his brothers. Instead of honouring him and covering it, he made jest of his father. In contrast, Shem and Japheth honoured their father and covered his nakedness. As a result, Ham was cursed. This story teaches a profound lesson about honour and respect (Genesis 9:20-27). It emphasizes the importance of protecting our fathers’ dignity, even when we see their flaws.

Sons who do not know how to honour their fathers will not find it easy to navigate life. Honour is a foundational principle that influences our character and relationships. Ephesians 6:2-3 states, “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—“so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” This commandment underscores the significance of honouring our parents as a cornerstone for a blessed life.

Many of our fathers, even those in the faith, might have some inconsistencies and weaknesses. We must not dishonour them or think we know more than they do. Respecting our fathers does not mean ignoring their faults but recognizing their humanity and the roles they have played in our lives. Proverbs 20:20 warns, “If someone curses their father or mother, their lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness.” This verse serves as a stark reminder of the consequences of disrespect.

How to Honour Our Fathers

1. Acknowledge Their Efforts: Appreciate the sacrifices and efforts they have made for your well-being. Express gratitude for the ways they have supported and provided for you.

2. Show Compassion and Understanding: Understand that your father is human and has his own struggles and weaknesses. Show empathy and patience when dealing with his shortcomings.

3. Communicate Respectfully: Speak to your father with respect and kindness, even when you disagree. Constructive communication helps maintain a healthy relationship.

4. Follow Their Guidance: Recognize the wisdom in their experiences and teachings. Even if you choose a different path, value the lessons they have imparted.

5. Support Them in Old Age: Just as they cared for you when you were young, be there for them in their later years. Offer emotional, financial, or physical support as needed.

Honouring our fathers is not about ignoring their flaws but about respecting them despite their imperfections. It is about valuing their role in our lives and upholding the principle of honour that enriches our character and relationships. By doing so, we fulfill a divine commandment and build a legacy of respect and reverence for future generations.

Live as a Wise Man

I once had a friend who basked in the attention of numerous admirers, particularly because of his striking looks. It seemed like an enviable position to be in, with ladies vying for his affection even in our school days. Yet, amidst the allure of such attention, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was wisdom to be found elsewhere, beyond the fleeting pleasures of superficial attraction. As the saying goes, you only find ants in sugary things.

In the Book of Proverbs, we are cautioned against living senselessly and succumbing to the allure of promiscuity. Proverbs 7 paints a vivid picture of the consequences of such folly, warning against the path of the foolish who are ensnared by the temptations of promiscuous behaviour. It’s a sobering reminder that true wisdom lies not in indulging every desire but in exercising restraint and discernment.

Moreover, Proverbs 31 exhorts men not to squander their strength on fleeting pleasures, including the pursuit of women. Instead, it calls us to channel our energy towards worthy endeavours, aligning ourselves with God’s divine purpose for our lives. There is a profound lesson here for men – to prioritize spiritual and moral integrity over temporary gratification.

Living as a wise man entails more than just avoiding the pitfalls of promiscuity; it requires a commitment to sexual purity and self-discipline. By guarding our hearts and minds against the seductive traps of lust and temptation, we preserve our strength for nobler pursuits. This is not about suppressing our natural desires but rather harnessing them in service of higher ideals.

One key aspect of wisdom is understanding the value of self-control. It’s about mastering our impulses rather than being mastered by them. This is echoed in Proverbs 25:28, which states, “A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.” Without self-discipline, we are vulnerable to the destructive forces that seek to undermine our character and integrity.

Furthermore, Proverbs 6:25 advises, “Do not desire her beauty in your heart, and do not let her capture you with her eyelashes.” This verse serves as a reminder to guard our thoughts and desires, resisting the temptation to be swayed by external appearances. True beauty lies not in outward adornment but in the purity of heart and soul.

Living as a wise man means recognizing the inherent dignity and worth of every individual, and treating others with respect and honour. It means honouring commitments, respecting boundaries, and valuing relationships based on mutual trust and integrity. It’s about striving for excellence in all areas of life, seeking to fulfil our potential and contributing positively to the world around us.

In conclusion, to live as a wise man is to embrace the timeless wisdom found in the Book of Proverbs. It’s about cultivating a heart of discernment, a mind of understanding, and a spirit of self-discipline. By following the guidance of Scripture and staying true to our values, we can navigate life’s challenges with grace and integrity. So let us heed the wisdom of the ages and strive to live as wise men, honouring God and pursuing excellence in all that we do.

How to Gain Wisdom as a Man

I remember the first time I truly fell in love with books. It was during my early days at the university. My passion wasn’t limited to a single genre; fiction, non-fiction essays, and autobiographies all captivated me equally. Initially, this hobby seemed somewhat misaligned with my Engineering studies—often, I found myself setting aside textbooks in favour of these engrossing reads. Despite this, a persistent internal whisper urged me on: “Just keep reading.” This passion led me to spend my pocket money on books—funds I could have otherwise spent on clothes or shoes. At the time, I didn’t fully recognize this as a crucial investment, one that would yield profound dividends well into the future.

The scriptures are clear on the pursuit of wisdom. Proverbs 4:7 advises, “Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.” This echoes the sentiment that the pursuit of wisdom is not just beneficial; it is essential. Another poignant reminder comes from Proverbs 7:4, where wisdom is personified as kin: “Say unto wisdom, Thou art my sister; and call understanding thy kinswoman.” Such verses underscore a profound truth—wisdom should be as familiar and close to us as our own family.

The fear of the Lord is indeed the beginning of wisdom. This foundational principle is not just about reverence but involves a deep acknowledgement of God’s omnipotence and righteousness. Engaging with God through scriptures and prayer provides the cornerstone for true wisdom.

Beyond spiritual pursuits, wisdom can be gained through practical, every day means:

1. Read Voraciously: Just as my university days of reading broadly across genres enriched my understanding, so too can it enrich yours. Literature opens windows to new perspectives and life lessons, fostering a deeper comprehension of the human experience and the intricacies of the world around us.

2. Learn from Elders: Respect for the aged, especially those who have displayed wisdom, provides invaluable lessons that cannot be gleaned from books alone. Older individuals offer insights drawn from a lifetime of experiences and mistakes. Engaging with them can provide practical wisdom that guides you through your own life’s journey.

3. Seek Divine Guidance(Our relationship with God): As stated in James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.” This powerful promise reminds us that wisdom is a gift from God, accessible to those who earnestly seek it through prayer and reflection.

Gaining wisdom is not a passive process but an active pursuit. It involves a combination of dedicated study, respectful learning from those who have journeyed before us, and an ongoing relationship with God. As you stand at the crossroads of countless decisions throughout your life, let wisdom be your guide, ensuring each step is taken with insight and foresight.

Fully Dependent

Reflecting on my journey through life, I recall a time when I placed unwavering trust in my own intellect and abilities. In secondary school, I often boasted about my academic prowess and reveled in my achievements. Representing my school in various intellectual competitions only fueled my confidence in my cleverness. However, my perception shifted drastically when faced with a pivotal moment during my quest for university admission.

Despite my academic achievements, I encountered a humbling setback when I failed my university entrance exam, known as JAMB, quite miserably. It was a sobering experience that led me to enroll in a pre-degree program as a stepping stone to university admission. This period of trial and uncertainty taught me a profound lesson: the importance of relinquishing self-reliance and placing my trust entirely in God.

“Do not wear yourself out to get rich; do not trust your own cleverness.” – Proverbs 23:4 (NIV)

Scripture reminds us in Proverbs 23:4 not to exhaust ourselves in pursuit of wealth and not to lean solely on our own understanding. This verse serves as a poignant reminder of the dangers of self-sufficiency and the wisdom of depending on a higher power. Through my own journey, I learned that true wisdom lies in surrendering our selfish ambitions and trusting in God’s divine guidance.

As men, we must embrace the wisdom of dependence on God. Rather than relying on our own strengths and strategies, we must humbly submit to His will. This surrender does not signify weakness but rather strength in acknowledging our limitations and recognizing God’s sovereignty.

Trusting in God alleviates the burdens of life’s challenges. He leads us on paths beyond our comprehension and provides us with the necessary tools and resources to fulfill His purpose for our lives. Scripture assures us in Isaiah 40:31 that those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

The journey of life is fraught with obstacles, but those who place their trust in God find strength to overcome adversity. As young men, it is easy to succumb to fatigue and falter in the face of challenges. However, those who anchor their faith in God rise above limitations and soar to new heights.

In our pursuit of success and fulfillment, let us not forget the foundational principle of wisdom: dependence on God. He bestows upon us the wisdom to navigate life’s complexities and the strength to endure its trials. As wise men, let us heed the timeless counsel of Scripture and entrust our lives to the One who holds our future in His hands.

Embrace the wisdom of dependence on God. Surrender your ambitions, trust His guidance, and witness the transformative power of faith. You are a wise man when you depend on God.

Wise Men

In life, there are moments when we look back and wish we had possessed the foresight to make better decisions. Those instances where a lack of understanding or wisdom led to unnecessary struggles or challenges. How many times have we found ourselves in situations where a little more insight could have spared us from the toll of our ignorance? Indeed, the pursuit of wisdom is crucial, especially for those who aspire to lead fulfilling lives.

The scriptures urge us to embrace wisdom, to regard it as a cherished companion. Proverbs 7:4 reminds us to say to wisdom, “You are my sister,” and to insight, “You are my relative.” This metaphorical language emphasizes the intimate relationship we should cultivate with wisdom. It’s not merely a passing acquaintance but a close confidant, deserving of our pursuit and admiration.

God himself encourages us to seek wisdom earnestly. James 1:5 reassures us that if we lack wisdom, we need only ask, and it will be given to us generously, without reproach. This divine promise underscores the importance of humility in the quest for wisdom. It requires acknowledging our limitations and recognizing the need for guidance beyond our own understanding.

Humility, often misunderstood as weakness, is, in fact, a cornerstone of true strength. It allows us to set aside our ego and open ourselves to learning and growth. As the proverbial saying goes, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” (Proverbs 9:10). This fear is not about cowering in terror but rather about approaching life with reverence and awe, acknowledging our place in the grand scheme of things.

In embracing humility, we acknowledge that we do not have all the answers. We accept that there is wisdom to be gained from those around us, regardless of their station in life. The wise do not seek to dominate but to understand. They recognize that true wisdom lies not in the accumulation of knowledge but in the application of it for the betterment of oneself and others.

It is through humility that we become receptive to the lessons life has to offer. We learn from our mistakes, recognizing them not as failures but as opportunities for growth. Humility enables us to listen more than we speak, to observe more than we judge. It fosters empathy and compassion, qualities essential for building meaningful connections with others.

Moreover, humility opens the door to collaboration and cooperation. It acknowledges that no one person has all the answers and that we are stronger together than we are apart. When we approach life with humility, we invite others to join us on the journey, pooling our collective wisdom for the greater good.

In conclusion, the power of humility cannot be overstated. It is the key that unlocks the door to wisdom, guiding us on the path to success and fulfillment. By embracing humility, we position ourselves to receive the insights and understanding necessary to navigate life’s challenges with grace and resilience. So let us strive to be wise men, humbly seeking knowledge and wisdom in all we do.

​​How To Love Your Woman Right

You know it was Mothers’ Day some days ago, and in the light of the love we have for them, many men sought to know how to treat their women right. Yet, amidst the plethora of advice and tips on this, one timeless truth reigns supreme: to truly love your woman right is to understand her personal rhythm and dance to its beat. Welcome to this brief journey of discovery, as we dive into the art of loving your woman with grace, authenticity, and unwavering passion. So, gentlemen, buckle up! (PS: While this really directly talks about those who are married, the singles but engaged can draw out insight to implement also)

In the amazing journey of relationships especially marriage, the love between a man and a woman is a reflection of the divine love that binds us all. As Christian men, it is our calling and privilege to love our wives in a manner that mirrors the unconditional love of Christ for His church. To love your woman right is to embark on a journey of selflessness, humility, and unwavering commitment, guided by the principles of faith and compassion.

First, loving your woman right begins with understanding and cherishing her as a precious gift from God. Each woman is fearfully and wonderfully made, endowed with unique qualities, strengths, and vulnerabilities. Take the time to truly know her, not just as your wife or woman, but as a beloved daughter of God. Embrace her individuality and celebrate the beauty of her soul, recognizing that she is a reflection of God’s grace and love in your life.

Communication lies at the heart of every meaningful relationship, and marriage is no exception. We are called to communicate with our wives in an honorable manner that reflects Christ’s love and compassion. Make time for heartfelt conversations, listening attentively to her thoughts, feelings, and concerns. Endeavor to create a safe and nurturing space where she feels valued, heard, and understood. Speak words of affirmation and encouragement, uplifting her spirit with the power of your love and support. Let your communication be seasoned with grace, kindness, and humility, as you strive to build a foundation of trust and mutual respect.

It is also essential to recognize and honor the sanctity of your wife’s emotions and needs. We are called to love our wives so much and it is expected to come with sacrifice and selflessness. You should interestingly be attuned to her emotional space, offering comfort and solace in times of distress and rejoicing in moments of joy and triumph. Cultivate empathy and compassion, walking alongside her in the highs and lows of life’s journey. Show her grace and forgiveness, as the time goes knowing that she is not perfect. Let your love be a beacon of hope and healing, illuminating her path with the light of God’s unfailing love.

Again, loving your woman right entails honoring and respecting her as an equal partner in your marriage. As a man, you should lead her with humility and servanthood, as it is obvious that at the heart of true leadership is service. Be of help as you grant her insight into her decision-making processes. Hey man! Be her staunchest advocate and fiercest supporter, championing her dreams and aspirations with unwavering devotion. Also, you should learn to treat her with dignity and respect, affirming her worth as a beloved child of God. Let your actions speak louder than words, demonstrating your love through acts of kindness, thoughtfulness, and selflessness.

Ultimately, to love your woman right is to embody the essence of Christ’s love in your marriage or premarital relationship. Let your love be a reflection of God’s boundless grace and mercy, extending forgiveness, compassion, and understanding at every turn. May your marriages and relationships be a testament that love can be so detailed, and yet simple, shining brightly as a light and inspiration to all who witness it.

And Hey! It’s Women’s History Month. Don’t just read. Go and practice!

Cultivating Equipped and Resourceful Minds

In a world filled with challenges and opportunities, the quest to become equipped and resourceful men is an aspiration shared by many young individuals. To embark on this journey, we turn to the wisdom of a simple yet profound poem:

FECUND MIND

If you want to set

The soles of your feet

On lands and to realms you have never been,

Caress, smooch, and romance books.

The mind is a wide, bare, fecund land,

Where needful trees must be rooted in,

And if left to fallow,

Weeds find their abodes on it.

Like whetstones to swords,

Sharpen and hone your mind with books,

And in years to come,

With it, you rip the flesh of enemies,

And heal the souls of men.

Silas Bamigbola (Lost Boys)

The words above, inspire us to unlock our potential through the power of knowledge. Let’s delve into how this poem embodies the essence of becoming equipped and resourceful men.

1. Setting Foot on Uncharted Lands

The first stanza of the poem urges us to set our soles on uncharted lands. This is a metaphor for exploring new territories, be it in our careers, personal lives, or the pursuit of wisdom. To embark on this journey, we must “caress, smooch, and romance books.” Books are our guides, mentors, and windows to the world’s collective knowledge. By immersing ourselves in literature, we equip our minds with the tools to navigate the unknown.

2. The Fecund Mind

The mind, as described in the poem, is portrayed as a wide, bare, fecund land. Just like fertile soil, the mind must be cultivated with care. Neglect allows weeds to take root, symbolizing the dangers of ignorance and misinformation. To become equipped and resourceful men, we must nurture our minds by sowing the seeds of knowledge and critical thinking. It is through this process that the “needful trees” of wisdom take root, giving us the foundation for growth.

3. Sharpening the Mind with Books

The second stanza emphasizes the importance of sharpening our minds with books. Much like a whetstone hones a blade, books serve as the tools for honing our intellect and skills. In the words of the poem, we are reminded that with a well-prepared mind, we can “rip the flesh of enemies” and “heal the souls of men.” This dichotomy reflects the dual power of knowledge – the ability to overcome challenges and contribute positively to the lives of others.

In conclusion, the journey to becoming equipped and resourceful men is one that demands constant nurturing of the mind. The poem “FECUND MIND” serves as a timeless reminder that books and the pursuit of knowledge are our faithful companions on this path. We must embrace them wholeheartedly, for it is through our commitment to learning that we will thrive, overcome adversities, and make a lasting impact on the world.

In a world where opportunities abound, and challenges are ever-present, it is our responsibility to harness the power of the fecund mind, to set foot on uncharted lands, and to embrace the wisdom that books offer. Through this, we can become equipped and resourceful men, poised to shape the future with knowledge as our ally.

Equipped Men!

In our society, we see a multitude of men who are ill-prepared to be the best versions of themselves, husbands, and fathers. It’s a harsh reality that contributes to the existence of many struggling men, husbands, and fathers. The path to becoming a better man lies in being well-equipped, both spiritually and mentally.

The Quest for Equipped Manhood

As a man, your journey toward self-improvement begins with the recognition that there’s more to being a man than meets the eye. My friend Raymond Oluwalola once said, “Silas, God can bring us into our full element as men.” This profound statement holds true for every man, but it necessitates a willingness to go through the process of becoming a well-equipped man.

A Relationship with God

The very first step toward becoming an equipped man is establishing a meaningful relationship with God. Recognize that life is spiritual, and equipping yourself against the plans of the enemy is crucial. Moreover, as a man, you are meant to be a strong foundation and protector for your family. Building a strong connection with God through prayer and studying His word is essential to becoming that unshakable foundation.

Discovering Your Life Purpose

Every man has a unique purpose in life. To fulfill that purpose, you must embark on a journey of self-discovery. This journey may require you to face challenges and make sacrifices, but it is an essential step toward becoming the man you were meant to be. It’s about understanding your calling with the help of God and working tirelessly to fulfill it, setting an example for your family and community.

The Power of Knowledge and Growth

Equipping yourself as a man also involves a commitment to continuous learning and growth. Read books, listen to the wisdom of others, and immerse yourself in educational and transformative materials. Expand your mind and broaden your horizons. By doing so, you’ll gain the knowledge and wisdom necessary to become the man God intended you to be.

Conclusion

In conclusion, the journey to becoming an equipped man is not easy, but it is profoundly rewarding. Start by strengthening your relationship with God, understanding your life purpose, and committing to personal growth. Remember that you have the power to grow and reach your full potential.

Embrace the process of self-improvement and watch as you evolve into the man you were destined to be – a man who not only enriches his own life but also serves as a source of strength, guidance, and inspiration to his family and community.

The path to becoming an equipped man is before you. Take that first step today, and you’ll be amazed at the transformation that unfolds.

The Essential Roles of Fathers in Raising Responsible Men

The assurance that comes with knowing one has a father is always encompassing. This can be observed most often in the way children, both males and females, feel secure in a place when they can see their father present. Moreover, the guarantee that a male child will be well-nurtured and developed into a mature adult is almost certain if the role of a father is prominent during his formative and youthful days.

From the aforementioned, it is evident that the role of a father is undeniably crucial and should not be underestimated. In this discussion, let’s consider five key roles a father plays in maturing a male child into a responsible man and eventually a good father:

1. Vision Casting

2. Diligence

3. Discipline

4. Love

5. Godliness

  • Vision Casting: The extent to which one will succeed in life and the commitment to living a fulfilling life often depend on having a clear vision. A father plays a vital role in helping his offspring lead a purpose-driven life by setting an example through his own actions and choices.
  • Diligence: A father’s commitment to his family becomes palpable over time, and his dedication is something that both his family and others can easily perceive. This dedication is demonstrated through the lengths he goes to for his family, the sacrifices he is willing to make, and his strong work ethic in ensuring his family thrives. The way a father provides for his family serves as a valuable lesson for his children, teaching them that a responsible man should not be idle in order to provide for his loved ones.
  • Discipline: Discipline is a key factor in determining whether one will lead a fulfilled life or not. A father who lives a disciplined life can effectively guide his children to lead disciplined lives as well, as they can witness firsthand what it means to exercise self-control. Children will also learn the importance of avoiding social vices, resisting peer pressure, and making choices that will positively impact their lives.
  • Love: A child who feels their father’s love at home does not need to seek validation from others to lead a life aligned with their values and beliefs. A father is expected to love his children, ensuring that they do not feel the need to seek love at any cost. Discipline should be administered with love, and communication should be rooted in love. When this approach is taken, children will feel comfortable opening up to their father when facing challenges and seeking guidance.
  • Godliness: The foundation for living a purposeful life lies in being godly and having a reverence for God. A father is expected to set an example of godliness for his children, as it helps them live lives characterized by integrity and faithfulness. Children who uphold these values will not bring shame to their parents.

In conclusion, the role of a father in shaping godly men cannot be overstated. Fatherhood is a significant influence on a child’s development and eventual character.

The Place of a Father as a Priest of the Home

You, as a father, occupy a unique and sacred role within your family – that of the spiritual priest of your home. This is a profound responsibility, one that carries immense significance for your family’s well-being and spiritual growth. In this blog post, we will explore your role as the spiritual leader in your household, drawing from the wisdom found in scripture.

Your Role as the Spiritual Overseer:

Your position as a father places you in the role of a gatekeeper for your family’s spiritual journey. While it’s commonly understood that many men seek prayerful women as partners to create a spiritually vibrant home, it’s essential to recognize that your own spiritual leadership is equally vital. Your relationship with God forms the foundation upon which your family’s faith is built.

Lead with the Power of Prayer:

You’ve likely heard children say, “My mother’s prayers keep me going.” But what about your prayers as a father? Don’t underestimate the influence of your own prayers. Your connection with God empowers you to lead your family along the path of righteousness and to cover them with your heartfelt intercession.

The Wisdom of Scripture:

Deuteronomy 6:4-7 (NIV) underscores the weight of your role: “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”

This scripture emphasizes that you, as a father, must actively instill God’s teachings into your children’s hearts through daily interactions and discussions.

Your Profound Influence:

A 2019 study published in the journal Religious Education revealed that children of born-again Christian fathers had a remarkable 93% chance of becoming born-again Christians themselves. This influence far surpasses the 3% chance for children of non-born-again parents. This study underlines the immense impact fathers have on their children’s faith journeys.

The study found that children of born-again Christian parents were more likely to be born-again Christians themselves, with a 3% chance for children of non-born-again parents, a 36% chance for children of born-again mothers, and a 93% chance for children of born-again fathers. 

-A study published in the journal Religious Education in 2019

Actively Transmitting Faith:

Ephesians 6:4 (NIV) further reinforces your responsibility: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” This verse highlights that you are entrusted with nurturing your children’s faith and ensuring it aligns with God’s Word.

Your Roles as a Father:

In summary, your roles as a father in the position of the priest of your home are profound and multifaceted:

1. Spiritual Leader: You are the spiritual guide of your family.

2. Prayer Warrior: Your prayers are a powerful shield for your loved ones.

3. Teacher of Faith: You impart wisdom and knowledge about God’s love and commandments.

4. Role Model: You set an example of faith and devotion, demonstrating what it means to live a godly life.

5. Protector: You safeguard your family, both physically and spiritually.

In conclusion, as a father, you play an irreplaceable role as the priest of your home. Embrace this sacred duty with love, dedication, and a deep connection with the Divine. Through your commitment to God, your family, and your role as a spiritual leader, you will create a home where faith thrives, and the presence of God is undeniable, enriching your family’s spiritual journey.